I stood there in my matching pajama set sipping an Aperol spritz- an ode to my favorite sipping drink from a pre-baby adventure to the Amalfi coast, mopping our floors & reveling in the fact that a day does exist in favor of my existence. My existence and life as I knew it had changed intangibly the year prior. Who even was this 32 year old woman? Equal parts drowning hot mess and accomplished yet ambitious. Both, equally transformed and developing day by day. So much has changed and although I would not choose to change a single thing, it is alot to absorb. I am an analyzer and haven’t had a moment to access my life in a year. So, here we go.
For the last year, any free time I have is correctly consumed by my little one, Indi. I turn into a potato the second she falls asleep and am asleep shortly thereafter. I wake up to do it all over again.
Having children definitely familiarizes one with survival mode and quick thinking. I’ve learned that parents must move quick to stay ahead of the little ones and to keep up with what is left of our person. I know I was divinely made to be a mother. But the pace and excitement of my past life is not lost on me. The simultaneous occurence of my motherhood and pandemic stopped my social life, fitness habits, blogging and DIY hobbies, and truly all old habits in their tracks.
Perhaps it is a rewiring that comes with giving birth or perhaps we are just distracted by a new baby to not fully understand the transformation with which God blessed us in that one day. I’ve been flooded with enough serotonin to know I would lay down my life for her in a second. However, the life I want to give her requires me to stay ambitious, perseverant, and creative.
So as I finish mopping our kitchen and then close my eyes with 31 behind me, I make some determined concessions about my 32nd chapter. I plan to work toward my new normal. Perhaps I will not get to teach yoga again soon, but I will maintain my fitness at home. Painting is decidedly never going to make me money, but I will still take on passion projects when possible as a hobby, but remain on the backburner. Financial freedom is my priority. At the end of the day I want Indi to have every resource. Investing into passive income sources is my focus. Real estate and blogging are my primary sources and the largest potential for passive income, so I plan on getting back to both. It may take some time, but I will start blogging again.
So here I am. Not necessarily transformed or changed, but most definitely living my new normal. I no longer have the luxury to sulk over failures as I simply do not have the time. I picked up a new limb, but I am still working to climb my mountain. My work ethic toward self confidence, financial freedom, and creativity are more paramount than ever because I need to share and enjoy those with Indi.
